I Miss You

(I wrote this up a few days ago and even published for about an hour. Then I changed my mind because I thought it sounded a bit whiny. Then Jeff made an appearance in the comments section of yesterday's post and I got all misty again. Also, one of my best friends from Utah called and as we talked my heart was tugged toward the Western Present, as opposed to my watered down past. So If you are in the mood for some whining and want to indulge in my nostalgia, read on. And if this post makes you roll your eyes at me and say "grow up, be grateful," that's okay, too.)

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It's that time of year again. The time when I start to feel more lonely and weepy than I do at any other time. The time when I feel more like Eeyore and less like Tigger and Roo.

I feel like Max did when he had settled down after his Wild Rumpus with the Wild Things.

I long to be where someone loves me best.

Even though I am selfish, and lazy, and can get a little ornery.

I want to be with those of you who know me inside out and like me anyway.

It's been a long time since I stood in my aunt's kitchen and single-handedly consumed an entire bowl of homemade salsa and washed it down with the pleasant taste of my foot.

It's been even longer since I played games into the wee morning hours with Jeff and Andrew and Robert with the kids sleeping in their beds.

I miss spontaneous Sunday Sing-A-Longs that chase Uncle Scott and Quinn into the basement.

I miss Chelsea making fun of the time I sat on a pair of scissors when we were playing "The Arsenio Hall Show."

I miss April's unlimited supply of hospitality and Suzie's basement window displays. I miss their food, and their laughter.

I even miss their hugs. (I know, right? I never thought I would miss hugs from my in-laws, but I do. I do.)

I miss laughing with my husband's family till we cry.

I miss talking Robert's dad into playing late night games of charades and Celebrity Challenge. To this day I point to my outer thigh anytime I need to pantomime "ham."

I miss Thanksgivings from my childhood where dad would show up with random guests. Sara, do you remember when that Leonard guy showed us how to crunch up a coke can and make it look like art? I kept that Coke can for years. I even moved it to our new house.

Do you remember the year that we caught the napkins on fire as we passed the rolls over the lit candles?

I still remember the year that our mother and her sisters introduced New Wave JELL-O. That was revolutionary. I wonder if they thought we would still be making it twenty years later.

Those are my favorite traditions. Accidental and non-contrived.

Remember the year we singed grandpa's eyebrows right off his face with our attempt at a deep-fried turkey?

I want to be someplace where I am not the grown-up.

It's true what they say, though. You can't go home.

I can't, anyway.

Starting from scratch can be fun. I know that years from now I will look back and miss this year's Celebrations, and last year's and next year's.

I feel the need to surround myself with people who can stand in for my family. Who are willing to be the people we will talk about years from now. Maybe some of them will still be our Turkey Eaters then and together we will remember old friends who have moved on. One can only hope.

I realize I am forging new memories that will get misty with time.

Someday I'll be longing for the sound of my kids running around the house, begging to help make the food. I'll wonder who moved the clocks forward.

Today, though, if I could, I would be up at Sara's,

or hanging out at Linette's bugging Kate and talking Shannon into bringing the boys down,

or down at Kim's house rummaging through her cupboards and getting a Diet Coke from the basement Fridge,

or on my way to Diana's and a magical time at Disneyland,

or watching my dad think of new and crazy ways to cook a turkey.

I miss you all more than you can imagine and probably more than I should.

Thanksgiving Menu

This is last year's Thanksgiving table.

What kind of a person would invite their friends over to share a Thanksgiving meal and then forget that they had invited said friends? Only a low down, dirty rotten, paramecium brain. That's who.

I would certainly never forget.

Look, when I asked her what she was doing for Thanksgiving (knowing perfectly well that I had invited her to my house several weeks ago) it was because I assumed her acceptance of my invitation had slipped her mind. Also, the local Medical Students like to go to the cafeteria at their school for Thanksgiving (don't ask), and I will not compete with the school cafeteria. I was giving her an opportunity to gracefully opt out of coming over. Just in case she had decided to eat her turkey served up by a lady in a hairnet and prescription shoes.

It's not like I forgot that I had already invited her. I mean, who would do that?

I started inviting local friends when Sissy broke the news that she and her family weren't going to make it. (sniffle) I understand the relentless master of School Schedules and Tight Budgets. (I am, once again, assuming that's why they aren't coming.)

I am excited that there are people around here who want to share the holiday with us. Corny as it sounds, I feel honored that these women want to bring their families to my home and break bread together.

Do you want to be my bosom friend for life? Then prepare food with me. There is magic in the preparation of food as flour, butter, and sugar bake away in the oven or chicken breasts simmer with mushrooms, rosemary, butter, and white wine.

Somewhere in that last sentence there is a metaphor comparing the melding together of different foods into a finished product more magnificent than any of the ingredients can be if they stand on their own to all different kinds of people with different experiences coming together and lifting one another up. Whatever.

Here's what we are eating at our house on Thursday:

Herb Brined Turkey with Gravy

New Wave JELL-O

Mashed Potatoes

Sweet Potatoes with crunchy Streusel Topping

Stuffing

Dinner Rolls

Fruit Salad

Oven Roasted Brussels Sprouts (or as we call them, B. Russ Sprouts in honor of Bryon Russell)

Assorted Pies

I'll probably have a wheel of brie and some crackers with olives and veggies for snacking. Because I love snacks. The only thing I am trying this year that I haven't in years past is the preparation of the herbs for the turkey. I'm going to blend them up and mix them with olive oil to make a paste that I will slather all over the bird.

I'd love to go down to my dad's and celebrate with him and my new Not Wicked Stepmother and my new Beautiful Stepsisters and Talented Stepbrother, but Robert's schedule won't allow it.

This is my turkey from last year soaking up the brine.

Jacob vs. Edward

This blog is about to sacrifice some portion of its dignity. Forgive me.

**Deep Breath**

On TWILIGHT:

I assume Bella chooses Edward because *spoiler alert* apparently they get married in the last book. I still need to finish the third book and move on to that last one.

I also got around to watching Twilight, the movie, a few weeks ago and this weekend I went to see New Moon.

Robert Pattison plays Edward just how I imagined him: creepy, brooding, controlling, and mildly wussy. Don't get me wrong. Brooding can be fun. I like Mr. Darcy's style of brooding but combine brooding with every painfully cheesy thing that Edward says and it's just too much. Besides, at least Mr. Darcy was head over heels for a spunky girl with some life to her.

Kristen Stewart, although beautiful, plays Bella just how I imagined her: dull, unimaginative, uninteresting, a total bore. She reminds me of all the girls/women I know who cannot function without their other halves. Give me a break.

Jacob, on the other hand, I adore. Happy, enthusiastic, energetic, passionate, and WARM! Oh, how I loved the scene when they were on their way back to her house in the truck and she snuggled right up to him so she could heat up. I don't even know the name of the guy that plays him. Hang on, I'll figure it out. Taylor Lautner. (Thanks, Diana!) I thought he was lovely.

So there you have it, my confession.

Not only am I a fan of Jacob, I saw New Moon opening night.

I went with a few girlfriends and I had a great time with them.

It was so much better than the first movie. I think I liked it better because I find the Bella/Edward drama to be tiresome. Their storyline was minimal in New Moon. They are so BORING together.

The squeals and gasps of the little girls in front of us during the movie were worth the price of admission.

That and the preview for Percy Jackson.

Maybe, just maybe, I see a family resemblance between Bella's werewolf and a certain somebody. Don't deny it, you see it, too. They could be the Filipino cousins to the kids who live just outside of Forks.

Bob and two of his Brothers in the Philippines circa 1999.

(I hope I haven't let my friend down who refuses to read the Twilight books because she is disgusted with the way middle aged women swoon and squeal over them. I may have swooned a tiny bit during the movie. But it was dark, so nobody saw, and I didn't squeal once.)

A List of Some Things I Love . . .

. . . and for which I feel Grateful:

1. Robert

2. Anytime Robert makes me laugh

3. My Children

4. Anytime I hear my Children laugh

5. Anytime I can make my children laugh

6. Eddie

7. Every time Eddie does the dishes (almost every night!)

8. Unlimited Long Distance from Qwest

9. Christmas music, especially: The Carpenters (for when I'm feeling all nostalgic about Christmas), Harry Connick, Jr., Jewel, Sarah McLachlin (for when I'm feeling all melancholy about the Holidays), Nat King Cole

10. Bedtime, and generally putting my kids to bed (the young ones) and visiting the kids after they go to bed (the older ones.) I love bedtime, not for the fact that they are going to bed, but for the few moments we share before they go to sleep. I like to hear the day's recap, this is often when they make requests (most recently: Diary of a Wimpy Kid, Dog Days), all four of them still love a bedtime snuggle. I just love bedtime.

No Actual Bunnies Were Harmed in the Making of this Costume

Okay, listen. I'm not feeling particularly clever in the word department. I emptied my cleverness account last week at my sewing machine and I especially didn't make any deposits today as I spent most of the day lamenting the fact that my sister may as well live on the moon for all the time we get to spend together. (What was it, Sara, like thirty six hours or something? Thirty six hours every six months is not enough time.)

I just read that last paragraph. Maybe I'm feeling more clever than I thought.

Following is a possibly non-clever account of how Halloween went down this year. I was mildly disappointed in how Stella's costume came out, but she didn't seem to notice how lame it was, so that's good.

I attended Creed's Fall Party. It was not a Halloween Party, it was a Fall Party. No costumes allowed. However, I was making slime with the children, so of course I needed a lab coat and protective eyewear. Can I help it if I looked like a Mad Scientist?

Friday was costume day at the gym, so I went as a witch. Everything I wore, I already owned. I pulled the dress out of our Halloween bin and just did a quick hem job because it needed to be short enough for me to bust out my roundhouse kicks.

George is the only one out of the five children in whose costume I am allowed any input. I figured since I am endlessly chasing him around, it would be fitting for him to be the White Rabbit to my Alice and Bob's Mad Hatter. I whipped up a vest and a bowtie and turned a kitty cat headband into a bunny rabbit headband with the help of some fake white fur and floral wire. I found a dress pattern with puffy sleeves and modified the bodice, then used an apron pattern I already had. I also made a petticoat because I wanted the dress to poof. I had settled on these costumes last year, way before I knew about Tim Burton's new movie. I hate being trendy, but I can't help it when it happens accidentally. So of course we styled our Mad Hatter after Colleen Atwood's. Besides, I am way ahead of Tim Burton because I've been quoting Lewis Carroll on my blog for years. (See the quote under my blog header? It's from the cautionary tale of The Walrus and the Carpenter. I probably should have credited Mr. Carroll with those words long ago.)

And here we have the whole gang. It may seem like the kids got the shaft in the costume department, but they got what they wanted. I really should be allowed more input. The boys announced on Tuesday that they needed cloaks for their costumes. Until then, Creed was insisting that he was going to play the part of Himself this year and Jack wanted to be a zombie in Jack clothing. Creed ended up going as a ghoul and Jack was a Little Person from the book series Cirque du Freak (which is also being turned to film by Hollywood this year.) I styled the cloaks without a pattern, and they turned out great if I do say so myself. Stella was Coraline. I adore her for breaking the Disney Princess mold and going as a quirky character whose favorite color is blue. I puffy painted white stars all over a black shirt. It looks really cool in a black light. We could not get her hair to turn blue. I sprayed and sprayed it with this crap from a can and while the entire bathroom, her face, and her hands and my boogers all turned blue, her hair never did. I stuck some blue clip-ins to her head and called it good. Not pictured is Eddie, who wore a camouflage jacket and a bandana and called himself a disgruntled veteran. He stayed home and passed out candy with his friends. The person in the photo to whom we are not related (but, if all goes as planned, we will be someday bwahahaha) is our friend who came Trick or Treating with us. I have an uncanny knack for convincing childless people to spend random holidays with me. (Hi Andrew! Hi Mark! I know you aren't reading, but Hello to a few of our best friends, anyway.) She was dressed as a Cave Woman and her Dog was The Beast. We turned the night into a scavenger hunt and the only thing we never found was a house serving Cider and Donuts.

The next night we had a Church Halloween Party. We Christians love our Pagan Holiday Traditions. Bob was ON CALL (Boo), and Sara was STUCK IN COLORADO (double boo), and Eddie REFUSED to wear the costume (boo boo boo), so the always amazing Robyn stepped in and played the part of my Mad Hatter. She is a true friend. That is Creed on the floor behind us being a ghoul.

I won second place in the chili cookoff with my pot of Chili Blanco. I even got a trophy. All in all, it was a pretty good night.

If you ask, I can totally bust out the Jabberwocky from memory.

Whet Your Appetite

Have I ever told you about the time I took second place in a chili cook-off while I was dressed as Alice in Wonderland?

I haven't?

Well, stay tuned. Pictures and words coming soon.

(I left my camera in the car and Eddie took my car to work today.)