Last Night Tarzan Made Me Cry

Thirteen years ago Disney released their version of the classic story about a man who was raised by gorillas. Robert and I along with my brothers (and my sister? maybe paul was with us too? who else . . . I think Jeff came with us. Were my parents there? I need to keep better records, my memory is fading!) to see it on opening night at that theater in Sugarhouse that is now an exotic rug store.

I remember loving it. I loved the Phil Collins soundtrack. I adored watching Tarzan sail through those trees. I liked Rosie O'Donnell as Turk. 

I was on the verge of becoming a mother myself and when Glenn Close sang the opening words to "You'll Be in My Heart" I remember resting my hand on my belly and imagining singing those words to my son as he grew.

I did/do sing those words to him.

I sing them to his siblings.

But darnit-all if they don't all keep growing!

Last night I watched that movie again at the request of these two little pancakes:

Holy cow if their giggles at the antics of the characters didn't lift my spirits, I don't know what would! Belly laughs out of my children is the best sound in the world. George started screaming in terror when Clayton captured Tarzan on the boat. It was great.

The moment when Glenn Close sang the words: 

Come stop your crying.

It'll be alright.

Just take my hand, 

hold it tight.

I will protect you 

from all around you.

I will be here.

Don't you cry.

the tears filled my eyes. I was thinking of that moment 13 years ago. I had no idea back then how motherhood would break me wide open and rebuild me into a better version of myself.

Then Phil Collins comes in and sings

For one so small, 

you seem so strong.

My arms will hold you 

keep you safe and warm.

This bond between us 

Cannot be broken

I will be here

Don't you cry.

(Wouldn't you know it, I'm crying again.) I was thinking of some obstacles my babies have overcome lately. They are so strong. 

On Tuesday morning I sent these two boys off to Scout Camp. I'm sure they are having the time of their lives without me. 

They are away from me for a whole week, on their own, in their own environment. Scout Camp is no place for mothers. (I worked my way into their experience by writing each of them a letter and tucking it into their bags before they left.) 

I just can NOT believe how fast they are growing. I even cried last night during "Son of Man."

In learning you will teach

And in teaching you will learn.

You'll find your place beside

The ones you love.

Son of man, look to the sky.

Lift your spirit, set it free.

Someday you'll walk tall with pride.

Son of Man, a man in time you'll be. 

I keep reminding Jack that he is, in fact, not thirteen years old YET. He is still twelve for another eleven days.

The very best part about being the mother to these people is their dad. It is so amazing that he rearranged his work schedule to be able to spend the first two days up there with them enabling Creed to go up early even though he is only eleven years old. 

It's so cheesy, but I really do want the ones I love to know that they will Always be In My Heart. Oh my lands, I am such a dork.